(*a tiny subspace hole opens up ...*)
HEY!
(*from Pocketspace/Subspace/the Spaces inbetween Space/Echospace --*)
AO-- (*schunk!*)
(*faint mumbling a bit like distant cussing*)
(*faint whittertalk noise*)
(*faint sob*)
(*Later, at the EGC Bar, where Atsuko is still hanging out, Aoi's movie makes its debut screening.*)Tifa Lockheart: My my, Ruto is quite a versatile person.
Atsuko: (*stares wide-eyed, slightly disturbed*) Dear lord, is the humam body even physically able to do that??
(*The two watch with detached interest. After a short pause, both faces screw up.*)
Atsuko: OH EWWWWWWW!!!!
Tifa Lockheart: (*gasps*) OUCH!! That's going to leave a mark on him tomorrow. (*stares at Atsuko*) Hey, are you going to live in my bar all day all night, or are you going to go home some time this week?
Atsuko: I'll order another sake if you let me stay a few more days.
Tifa Lockheart: (*thinks*) Deal.
I think Marine from SMJ OAV said it best, "DIRTY! DIRTY!"
My, my, you people are NAUGHTY! I oughta anvil you all...Initializing Automatic Anti Hentai Anvils Version 1.01
There...that should do it. Oh, and I almost forgot...
*Takes a can of spray paint and covers the lens of Aoi's camera with bright blue*
*dusts hands off*
CHATTYYYYYYYYYYYY!Hey hows it goin?
Gahhrrrrh...hh...hhh....hrrhl... *.+
Ruto: Oh, dear... I hope I didn't hurt him... too much. ^^;
Arrhhh... x.... x...
Ruto: "X" what?
X... x... x... exhausted...! *.+
Ruto: Aww... poor Ian-chan... you need more training!
Hrrrgrr... gllglglgll... WHAT???? O.O AAAAAAAAAARGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! *runs off screaming*
Ruto: *giggles* Oh, he acts so funny at times... I hope you didn't miss any details Aoi-chan... Anyway, do actors get a free copy? ^.~
Oh wowie... O.O I knew RL-sama was hentai... but that's... that's more than just hentai... that's Hentai... O.OSimon: Can... can you rewind to that scene where he... and she... and then he... ooooohh...! @.@
Hey: *drool*
Johnny: Men! ^^;
That was certainly the very last thing I expected you to say. ¬_¬;
Johnny: Ah-Hehe... ^^;
Spuddy! My God, it's a miracle! The Spud lives! (Translation: Oh, things are fine down here ... how's you?)
And Dot, how am I to bring our beloved mascot Yuna back if you keep being so accurate with those anvils, eh? Try the traditional mallet for a change. (*smirk*)
(Although I must admit, the idea that an RL and his Inspiration can ... well ... I mean ... err ... gee, those Mets are doing swell this season, huh? ^^;;)
Vermin: Since when were you into baseball?
Israfel: She's not.
Vermin: Then ...
Israfel: (*wink*)
Vermin: Oh.
(*Tiny twittering sound from Subspace.*)
Vermin: And what the HECK is that?
Israfel: Oh, that's just the normal Chatty insert crying for help.
Vermin: Oh. Nothing important?
Israfel: Nope.
Vermin: Good, I was worried.
Ah, guys? Oughtn't you to be going?
Israfel: Which direction?
Um ... bar direction? Use your senses?
Israfel: Yeah, but ... well ... okay, Vermin, you explain it.
Vermin: Me?
Israfel: A-yup.
Vermin: Oh ... well, um ... then ... well, y'see, the EGC is infinite, right?
True.
Vermin: That means EG City is infinite, right?
Also true.
Vermin: Then that means that the edges don't meet, and for all means and purposes the ground that EG City resides on is flat, doesn't it?
Also tr-- waaaaait ...
Vermin: If it's an infinitely expanding "flat" area with no end, meeting of the edges, or behavior like that of a "normal" dimension, how do you get from place to place without getting hopelessly lost?
Landmarks, naturally.
Vermin: Landmarks?
Yup, landmarks. And, uh, we started naming the streets after one of the invading roach platoons complained, so there's always that ...
Vermin: You named streets because of a roach's complaint?
(*sheepishly*) Yeah ...
Vermin: ..... gee ...
Don't you start with that whole "You ain't so bad after all" crap. I really am that bad. Now you go get to the downtown bar and find your brother before I change my mind about this whole Ending-of-the-War bizness, okay?
Vermin: Err ... okay. But I still think --
Israfel: Ooh! Look what I found! A BICYCLE! Resourceful, isn't he?
Vermin: Wha.. you're not going to STEAL that bike, are you?
Israfel: Vermin, this is Deep Uptown EGC -- I'm not stealing, I'm demonstrating co-interdependency.
Vermin: But --
Israfel: You'd rather walk the whole way?
Vermin: (*hops into the handlebar basket*) Start peddling, McDohlburger.
Israfel: Eh?
(*shrugs*) I loaned him my joke.
Israfel: Ah. Well then, which direction do we go?
Just go that way down Hubward Str. until you hit the center of EG City. You can't miss it, 'cause if you do you'll fall through the enormous hole and become meat splats in the center of De Civitate Dei, aka the City of God. Then when you get there you'll know which direction from the ebb of panic-stricken crowds. If for some odd reason there's a lack of panic-stricken crowds, Plan B can be "Keep going down Sutedja Ave. until you run into Sephiroth at some point".
Israfel: Ah, 's a simple route then ... c'mon, let's go!
(*He hops in the banana seat, begins to peddle and ...*) "/o Uptown giiiiiiirl
She's been livin' in her uptown woooorld ...o/"
Hehe ... sorry, could not resist that one. Thank God I resisted the urge for a little Andrew Lloyd Weber in there. (*smirk*)
Okie, I'm going to take a stab at following the story, so please forgive all the mistakes I'm about to make!!!
(*Back at the bar, the door opens an in walks Vermin and Israfel*) Vermin: Is this the right place?
Israfel: (*casing the place*) I guess. It's a bar, isn't it?
Atsuko: (*blinks*) A giant cockroach. (*pause*) EEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!! A COCKROACH!!!!
(*Atsuko hops onto the bar and pulls out a laser sword, waving it at the cockroach, attempting to look threatening but failing miserably*)
Tifa Lockheart: (*thinks*) Oh wow, she looks cute and carries a sword too! Who ever needed Cloud anyway? (*dreamy look*)
Vermin: (*holds up, umm.. limbs?*) No no, we're not here to fight!!
Atsuko: EEEK!! (*runs out of bar, trailing dust behind her*)
Tifa Lockheart: Wait! Come back! Awww.. (*glares at Israfel and Vermin*)
Israfel: What? What?
Where will Atsuko go now? Stay tuned next time!
Aoi: Sorry, Ruto-san, no one gets a free copy. ^_^ I'm running a business here. Besides, I need the money to replace the camera Dot-chan destroyed! ¬_¬
Lyn: *Muttering* Which she was justified in doing, incidentally....
Aoi: *Frowns* I didn't ask for your opinion, Seventh. Now get back to work making those copies! I want enough of these to sell to every hormone-laden frosh in Rouzer Hall!
Lyn: O_o; So we're selling these in RL-VS' dorm, now?
Aoi: ^_^ You got it!
*That's right, people, VoidStar hath officially joined the world of Higher Education! :D Rouzer is a pit, though....o.O;;; Well, anyway, moving on....*
Aerith: *Taps Tifa on the shoulder* *Ahem* Tifa-chan, may I have a _word_ with you? *Twitch*
Tifa: Anno....^_^;;;
Aerith: _Who_ is this Atsuko person and _why_ are you letting her stay here? ¬_¬
Tifa: ^_^;;;;; N-Now, Aerith-chan, you know it's nothing like that....
Aerith: It had better not. ¬.¬
Tifa: *Grins and wraps her arms around Aerith* Oh, it's not. ^_- How could I ever be unfaithful to you? Especially considering what's on the way....
Aerith: *Smiles softly, laying a hand against her stomach* Hai....
*As the pundits of MST3K once screamed, "PLOT POINT! PLOT POINT! PLOT POINT!"*
*And allow me to note....WOOHOO! WAI, ATSUKO-CHAN! :D You quoted my favorite Sabre Marionette J character! I just adore Marine!*
End communication.
MY GOD!! Israfel, how the HELL did you get here so quickly?!?!
Israfel: Demonstrated co-interdependency with the first motorcycle we came across.
WITHOUT SINGING A HARLEY SONG TO WARN ME?!!
Vermin: Why are you so upset? I thought you wanted us to get here as soon as possible ...
Yeah, but ... but ... that was Deep Uptown EGC! Really DEEP Uptown EGC! You just did Plattsburgh to Manhattan in record time!
Vermin: From what to what?
Make that Plattsburgh to Manhattan to Buffalo ... I mean, really, God Almighty Saints ALIVE, that's not friggin' possible, I don't think ... it only took ... only ... only ...
Israfel: Only what?
You know, I just looked at my wrist for the fifth time, and I suddenly realized ... I'm not wearing a watch ...
Israfel: I thought you didn't wear watches.
I don't.
Israfel: Well, the point is that we did an incredibly long distance in an immensely short amount of time ...
YES, and PRAY TELL, HOW?!
Israfel: Isn't it obvious?
Um ... no, if it was obvious, I wouldn't be asking. How?
Israfel: The screaming cute-girl!
What? The screaming cute-gi-- oh ... oh! Oh, indeed!!
Vermin: What? What oh indeed?
Atsuko-chan has an unfaded power of 'Youth'!
Vermin: What?
RLs necessarily have power over the EGC comparable to that of gods, more or less, but what makes us different is that we never use the full extent of our power. The reason why this is is that the longer an RL stays in EGC, the more accustomed he or she becomes to the EGC and the people (and roaches and spiders and elselike) within it. So, in a pragmatic sense, you could say that their power diminishes, although it's really more like they're forgetting the extent of their influence.
Israfel: They all become too immersed to act too detached or cold. Well, almost.
Right, but it seems to be related to 'age'. See me? As far as EGC is concerned, I'm one of the oldest. Have I led any of the characters under my care to a triumphant victory in physical combat recently?
Vermin: I wouldn't know.
Israfel: Ditto.
Huh. Well, I haven't. And neither has Shinobi, either, you'll notice.
Israfel: What about Hugh?
Err ... well ... hey, I thought you were supposed to be arguing WITH me, not AGAINST me!
Israfel: I know, but it's too much fun not to.
(*grin*) Grr ... anyway ... with a few exceptions, such as Jay/Kazuki and Voidstar, the RLs are too comfortable in their established niches to use the full extent of their power, because they know what it is and what it can do. And that sort of power is frightening.
Israfel: ... and with power comes responsibility, and with the power to destroy universes with a click of the key comes a helluva lot of responsiblity ...
Right. But a 'younger' RL does not yet know this because it's just one of those things that happen with experience, and as such they are ... 'more powerful'. Or less afraid. Pick and choose. In any case, it's not a foolproof theory, but you have to admit, I never could've popped off the Roach Leader. I may have the power, but I don't have the WILL that Sikaryan --
Vermin: (*frown*)
-- oooookay, bad example ... eh heh ...
Vermin: Actually, I think you're just lying to cover up the fact that you feel guilty about the whole matter of this war and his death.
(*sarcasm*) Damn, you see through me like so much yellow paper.
Israfel: (*cutting in*) So, we're here thanks to a thought of the powerhouse that is ... um ... the screaming cute-girl RL.
Atsuko-chan.
Israfel: Right.
This coming from the boy who called Ronnie Bell 'Giant Woman'.
Israfel: Your point being?
At the top of my head, I believe. Well, all I have to say is ... these peace negotiations had BETTER be tough as nails, you damn Vermin.
Vermin: (*wincing*) Why do you keep talking like that if you're trying to help me?
Help you? (*snort*) HELP YOU? Vermin, do you know what I'm thinking of right now..?
Vermin: Um ... no.
I'm thinking of catnip ...
Vermin: (*gasp*) ...
and kosher flametorches ...
Vermin: (*GASP*)
... AND BORAX.
Vermin: (*eyes wide in soundless horror*)
It's not a matter of not WANTING TO, my dear Roach Leader's son ... it's a matter of WANTING TO and NOT DOING IT.
Vermin: (*squeak*)
And do YOU have ANY idea why I'm sparing your LIFE?!
Vermin: ... n-no, I ... I don't ...
(*suddenly calm*) Neither do I.
Vermin: .......
Israfel: Hey, a kareoke machine!
Oh dear ...
"/o Tire tracks and broken heeeearts
That's all we're leavin' behiiiiiind
Doesn't matter WHAT we're losin'
It only matters what we're goin' to fiiiiiind ...o/"
Heh ... too many refs to count in here, folks. And we gots more tennis courts than you can shake a stick at!! (*shakes fist uptownward*) Buffy the Insect Slayer: Muffy, does this mean I don't get my cameo? Muffy: I'm afraid so, Buffy. Buffy: Oh, poopy. Spider: You're kute when you pout! Um ... guys? Guys? This footnote's getting big ... and really, it's no big deal ... Spider: That screaming girl is KUTE! (*hops up and down*) Err ... right ...
(*Oh, and before I forget ... meanwhile, in the BAR!*)
Jenova: Well, isn't this lovely ... Roísin, Kaworu, and the red-haired bum ran off in a hurry, Kii's taken his first day off without it having anything to do with Asuka, the Leader of the Roaches has entered the bar without intent of invasion, some funny kid in weird clothes is hogging the kareoke, the German Robot's fussing over Aerith since that basement attack, and we're all out of chocolate. Lovely day indeed. (*sigh*) Jack-kun, I miss you ...
Child: Gah?
(*She turns ... and what sight meets her face than that of a certain toddler who once was possessed by the Lord of Nightmares in a certain incident I don't have time to recount ... but more importantly, this is a certain toddler who also happens to be --*)
Jenova: TAI-CHAN!!
(*-- Tai Silverlance, son of Jack Silverlance. [Atsuko, e-mail Voids on this one, I always mess it up myself ...]*)
Jenova: What are you doing here?! I thought Lina was supposed to be taking care of you ...
Tai: Gagua baibai.
Jenova: Something happened to Lina?
Tai: Skishskish boomboom.
Jenova: Skishskish boomboom?
Tai: Boom boom BOOM. (*eyes water*)
Jenova: Awwwww ... you poor dear ... that's rough ...
(*On impulse, she picks him up. And this kindles whatever maternal instinct Jenova happens to have ... or whatever instincts she's developed as a bartender ...*)
Tai: (*whimpers*)
Jenova: Shhh, it's all right. Aunty Jenova's here, no need to cry ... shhh ...
Tai: Je..no..va?
Jenova: Yeah ...
Tai: Je-no-va. (*sniffle*)
Jenova: That's right, I'm Jenova and you're Tai. (*grin*)
(*Tai's only response is a big cherubic smile.*)
Jenova: (thinks: My God, they look so much alike ...)
Tai: Je-no-va!
Jenova: Awwww ... as if I could let you go now ... but still ...
Tai: Je-no-va!
Jenova: Oh, all right! (*teasing*) God, you're a lot like your father!
Tai: (*beams again*)
Whew! Two in a row ... but I been planning this one awhile, too, Voids ... (*wink*)