No ...this is not happening ...

Good Yuna: Aren't you dissappointed that it's Jen-chan that saved your rear end from oblivion instead of good ol' Ao--

(*THWACK*)

Good Yuna: Ow.

(*The DCD Public Emergency Intercom blasts again ...*)

Roach Leader: (*over DCD PEI*) 'Allo Mr. Chatty ... you listening out there? I do know you're out there ...

(*turning to the Intercom*) You again?!

Roach Leader: Ah, yes ... you do remember me, don't you?

(*expression darkening*) As if I wouldn't remember having my own EVA hijacked with me inside it.

Roach Leader: Ah, well ... the ends justify the means, right?

Considering your ends, I wouldn't think so.  Taking over Genesis isn't exactly justified.

Roach Leader: Odd that you should say that ... wasn't that your goal when you first came here?

(*sweatdropping*) Shut up!

Roach Leader: Touchy subject, eh? Gya ha ha ...

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

Roach Leader: Oh, negotiations again? Well, don't worry about being able to pay ... this time we've lowered our price.  Don't want Genesis or the people right now.  We really just want you to surrender, Mr. Chatty.

You're doing this to get me?

Roach Leader: A good reason, don't you think? You should be flattered, MR. Chatty.

(*crossing arms*) I'm not surrendering.

Roach Leader: I thought you would be this stubborn.  Would you like to hear some of the hostages? We've spread them around to prevent easy rescue ...

Hostages? What hos--

(*static*)

Skuld: (*over DCD PEI*) WAH!! Lemme go! I have enough trouble with bugs!!

Belldandy: (*over DCD PEI*) This isn't very nice at all ...

(*static*)

Sou: (*over DCD PEI*) Lovely situation, isn't it?

Jay: (*over DCD PEI*) I ... c-can't ... m-move ...!

Ken: (*over DCD PEI*) OW!! Stop hitting me!

(*static*)

Asuka: (*over DCD PEI*) Eeek!! Bugs! Get them away, get them away!! Eeeeeeek!!

Kii: (*over DCD PEI*) Asuka, do I look like I can squish bugs while I'm handcuffed?

Asuka: (*over DCD PEI*) Ah, ich weiss nicht ...preach at them or something ... please!!

(*static*)

Aya: (*over DCD PEI*) Damn ... this always happens to me, never anyone else ...

Mayuri: (*over DCD PEI*) Interesting how organized these things are ...much like the Lilim ...

Gendou: (*over DCD PEI*) Err ... watch where you point that flamethrower, Mr. Cockroach-sama ...

(*static*)

Fink: (*over DCD PEI*) Help! Quack!(*static*)

Maya: (*over DCD PEI*) Ritsuko-sempai, I'm scared!!

Ritsuko: (*over DCD PEI*) Don't worry, Maya-chan, everything's going to be all --- HEY!! Stop that, you grubby little bug ...

(*static*)

Roach Leader: Is that enough hostages for you?

Alright, what are you trying to do here ... trade me for them?

Roach Leader: No, no ... far too many loopholes in that.  Rather, I'm going to give you a choice.  In ten seconds, I'll give orders for their immediate execution ...

WHAT?!

Roach Leader: ... unless you should happen to surrender by then.  Gya ha ha.

You're completely whacked out.

Roach Leader: Ten ... nine ... eight ...

This won't work! We'll stop you!

Good Yuna: Well, at least Mr. Ikari and Dr. Sencha die ... that's worth something ...

Roach Leader: ... seven ... six ... five ...

No! Please don't make me do this ...

Roach Leader: ... four ... three ... two ...

ALRIGHT!! I SURRENDER!!

Roach Leader: Gya ha ha.  I knew you'd see reason.  Are you ready?

(*dejectedly*) Hai ...

(*A vacuum portal appears just as Aoi arrives in the area*)

Good Yuna: (*pointing*) Look!! It's Aoi!! AOI!

(*and the portal promptly sucks Chatty in and closes in upon itself [what a sense of timing =P]*)

Roach: All clear?

Roach Leader: .... ALL CLEAR!! FIRE AT WILL!!

Good Yuna: But you said --

Roach Leader: Screw what I said!! You thought I meant it? Gya ha ha ha ha!!

Good Yuna: If my other half ever listened to me, I'd make her beat you up now ...

---

*Shinobi and Co have gotten away from the roaches who had surrounded them and are now holed up below the EGC Bar*

Shinobi: Thank gawd Tifa had this place remodeled to resemble the Seventh Heaven in all details... otherwise we'd lack this hideout... ok, lets see who the roaches got... hmmm... Skuld, Belldandy, Sou, Jay, Ken, Asuka, Kii, Aya, Mayuri, Gendou, Fink, Maya, and Ritsuko... 

Girl: Those ecchi roaches got all of them!

Lyric: Argh... how did they get so many?

Shinobi: Prolly the same way they attacked us... a gang up while we weren't looking...

Reno: Then why aren't we captured?

Voodoo: They didn't account for our strenght of will, our force of arms... or our raw psychotic tendancies!

Bub: Argh...

Shinobi: Or the fact that they can't kill a zombie... There is only one thing we can do, we have to organize the free cameos and regs, and bust the captives out... and yes, we DO have to save Gendou... its only right, i'm afraid...

Voodoo: but do we have to save Gen- damn!

Shinobi: Friends, Cameos, Regs, lend me your ears!  A threat we had thought long vanished has reappeared, a foe we fought long and hard to defeat has resurfaced. Evil has returned to our lands, this time en masse, and this time it has absconded with our friends... this, my people, we must not allow... we must band together, we free Regs and Cameos we must form the Free Genesis Insurrection, and we must strike like lightning, in a concentraited attack, to free each and every captured cameo at once, and not give them time to make good on their threats of violence twards our captive friends... then we must band together and take the roach menace down, once and for all. Together we can form an army, and together we can take this threat down... Join me, my friends, and we will set what has been made wrong to rights, PERMANENTLY...

---

Well, that there brings us to a turning point... come on, m'people, lets dogpile on those damn things, *girn*

Btb: That NewsRadio (the Phil Hartman farewell ep) was highly sad, yes?

oh, and dis my speach and i'll go upside your head... k?

*VoidStar wipes away a moved tear at Shinobi's speech* Well spoken, my friend, well spoken.  I place my full forces at your disposal! ROLL CALL!!!

Ayanami Rei: Present!

Nagisa Kaworu: Present!

Tamashii Aoi: Present!

Tenkei: Present!

Tifa Lockheart: Present!

Aerith Gainsborough: Present!

Kisaragi Yuffie: Present!

Jenova: Present!

Ivy: Present!

Lanfear: Present!

*Suddenly, another portal like the one Lanfear used opens, and two more women dressed in fantasy novel series-like clothing pop out*

Mesaana: Lanfear-chan! ^_^ Cool place.  Heard about your problem....I hope you don't mind if we get a piece of this action!

Semirhage: You can never have too many Forsaken in an army, after all! ^_~

Lanfear: Mesaana! Semirhage! All _right_, this really is a party now! Join up, any buddies of VoidStar are welcome!!!

*And so, the armies of VoidStar and Shinobi assembled to beat back the vicious roaches invading EGC chat, and have a ton o' fun doing it! LET'S ROCK!!!!

Ugh...  Did I HAVE to ask about the cockroaches? Why did it have to be cockroaches...?

~Meanwhile, Skuld and Belldandy manage to get away from the evil cockroaches.~

Skuld: ~smashing a bug with her hammer~ Yay! I finally get to do some REAL bug smashing!

Belldandy: Now, Skuld, it's only to protect EGC from the cockroaches.  We aren't trying to be violent here.

Skuld: ~sigh~ Okay, onee-sama.

---

Okay, now the defenders have two more on their side! Let's get those roaches!!!

On a little side note, I probably won't be showing up for about a week, because I'm gonna get hit with Hurricane Georges...  Oh, joy...  See ya when I get power again! :D

The Ranma 1/2 cast seems to have been preoccupied the last couple of months. As they have returned they see that the EGC has been over run by roaches...

Neal: Roaches...? Sounds like that spider thing a little ways back....

Matt:Looks like it.... Hm...since we're back home... *smiles* 

Ranma: All right! A fight as soon as we get back! Pin pon!

Ki: Hm...this is gonna be interesting ne? 

Akane: We're here to help minna san!

Kamakiri: We'll squash them like insects! 

Wanderer: Since I have a new font color...let's kick some @$$! 

Tate: Let's rock. This is gonna get messy. *pops her knuckles* 

Cloud: I'm sorry I've been out for so long.. *pulls out Ultima Butter Knife* But I'm ready for this menace. 

Matt: Okay, roll call! Yazama Matthew is present and accounted for. 

Ranma: Saotome Ranma, here.

Akane: Tendo Akane, here.

Edge: Edge here....

Neal: Neal is present.

Tate: Tate here. All's well. 

Wanderer: Wanderer Shinnosuke, here. 

Kamakiri: Yamamura Liyah, here. 

Ki: Yazama Kikuma here. I'm ready to rumble. 

Cloud: Cloud here. *twirls his Ultima Butter Knife* Let's get this on. 

Matt: Okay troops. We're here to help Void and Shinobi. Z-Sabres are behind you 110%. You know what we do ne? So this is it. Roaches PREPARE YOURSELVES! 

A troop sentry of roaches walk down the streets of Firts Tokyo. The laugh at the threats of the Ranma 1/2 cast.

Matt: To protect this world from the slime that plagues it, we the Z-sabres are here on behalf of EGC! 

From out of nowhere four figures loom.Three male and one female.

Kamakiri: We're gonna make you pay for taking over the chat! *drop kicks one of the roaches* 

Ki: Party time! *jumps into the battle* 

Neal: Puh. Whatever. *starts firing ki blasts* 

Our heroes leap into battle and quickly win against the small troops.

Kamakiri: Ha! That was easy! 

At that precise moment, a legion of roaches flooded their way towards our heroes...

Matt: You were saying Kama-chan? 

They all sweatdrop, and run like hell, screaming help as they went along. The legion continues to follow.

---

*Shinobi and co. are finishing preparations beneath the EGC Bar... picture a quick montage of weapons bieng sharpened, loaded, energized, etc... i believe Army of Darknes had a scene that could be used as a reference...*

Shinobi: Lyric, what's the status of the other Battalions?

Lyric: VoidStar joined up (who had any doubt?), Nadia lept on (and her goddesses are free, but still in great danger behind enemy lines), and the Matt-Army is whoopin in the streets (yup, thought so...)

Shinobi: Good, and the other hostages?

Lyric: as yet, they are fine... oh and VS recently got more added to his ranks... Lanfear, Mesaana, and Semirhage are here...

Matt Cauthon: Aaaa!  Forsaken!

Shinobi: Calm thyself (woolhead) Somebody has to greet them properly... Kodome calinichnye ga ne "Forsaken" her

Matt: Wow, and i thought i was the only one who busted out with the Old Tongue at the drop of a hat...

Lyric: For everybody who doesn't know the OT, Shinobi just said "There is always welcome for Forsaken here" and i can't for the life of me figure out why...

Shinobi: Well, i didn't have the time to learn the OT equivalent of Forsaken...

Reno: While you two were talking, the roaches surrounded us...

Voodoo: AGAIN??!!

Shinobi: Argh... that's too many times now... well, nothing but left but to act, my friends! Heres the plan, first we rescue the hostages, then we regroup here, under the Bar, and finally we roll out and go apeshit on the roaches, not a one will leave here alive, i am quite tired of leaving living enemies behind me...

Girl: Ummm... are you sure you are the GOOD one?

Shinobi: Mostly, just don't push me or be a roach.... then *Flourishes the Kabal*

Girl: Eeep...

Shinobi: Exactly... MOVE OUT! and all other members of the Free Genesis Insurrection, ATTACK!

Matt Cauthon: Dovie'ande se tovya saghain!

Shinobi: *shrugs* Mordero daghain pas din cuebiyar!

---

Let's Dance the Spears, everybody (yes, i DID just reserve a copy of _Path of Daggers_, why?)

Matt C.: Ok, one day we are really gonna have to have a talk about this Old Tongue thing...

Shinobi: Sure, yeah, but there's a roach on your back...

*S'Kean steps out of the basement shadows dragging Floyd behind him*

S'Kean: Barely got out of there alive.. Flying Monkey, Fink, Crow and Tom Servo are still up there! So are my computer and that flying laptop thingy.

Race: But I made it out! *steps out of the darkness of the corner* I also found this! *drags Coch'Rahn by the collar*

Coch'Rahn: Let me go, you blasted freelance adventurer!

S'Kean: YOU! You brought the roaches here, didn't you?

Coch'Rahn: No! I swear! The roaches have their own agenda.. I just want to destroy subspace!

S'Kean: SHADDAP! *punches him in the face, then turns to Shinobi* So.. you organizing a Roach Resistance, eh? I'm in.

Race: Me too! Lemme throw a barrel at 'em!

Coch'Rahn: OWW! I dink you bwoke by dose!

S'Kean: I SAID SHADDAP! *knees him in the groin*

Coch'Rahn: O_o;;

S'Kean: Now that the pleasantries are dispensed with.. let's go...

---

Roach war!

Lanfear: Heads up, Mat! *A bar of balefire disintegrates the roach on Lord Cauthon's back* You're lucky my personality's been transmutated.  ^_^

Semirhage: ^^;;; Er, Lan-chan, you do remember that excessive use of balefire can damage a dimension.  Sometimes irrevocably.

Lanfear: Simple enough answer: the roaches aren't from this dimension.  ^_^

Semirhage: Hmmm....good point.  LET'S PARTY!!!! *Semirhage cuts loose with a blast of balefire wide enough to engulf a car, sweeping it across the roaches*

Basic explanation of balefire: A bar of liquid white fire which tends to permanently burn the retinas of those who look at it too long.  But ocular damage is the least of one's worries: if balefire actually _touches_ you, you are GONE.  Instantly.  Actually, your death occurs a certain amount of time _before_ the balefire touches you--it kills you back in time.  You're dead before you die, in other words.  And any actions you took in that stretch of time are undone, with only memories remaining.  In other words, it's the ultimate instant-kill weapon.  ^_^ Have a nice day.

Rei: *Looks at the excessively long explanation* You coulda just said it zaps 'em out of time, you know.

^_^ Too simplistic.  Anyway, let's kick some ass!

Tifa: ^_^ Agreed! These things are bad for business!

Aerith: Let's really get this party started! *Aerith pulls the White Materia from her bow* ^_^

Lanfear: *Fires another shot of balefire*

Aoi: *Levels a few hundred roaches with her AT Field*

*VoidStar jumps up on the counter and shouts commands* FORSAKEN!!! ROLLING RING OF EARTH AND FIRE!!!!

Forsaken: HAI!!!!

BOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!

*Many many charred roaches*

WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON?!

*levels her AT field anyway*Stupid roaches..they just keep coming and coming..

*notices the mad slaughterhouse of roaches*hmm..hmm..^^;

o0(Geez,I don't be alone in a dark alley with the Shito Sentai around.....0_o)

*sweat sweat*

Misato:What the hell are you doing standing there?!MAKE YOURSELF USEFUL!>o<

*piku*

Misato: v_v;;;;*sigh*

*steps on a roach*>o<

*a loud squishy noise echoes*

Misato:GROSS!She means business!=P

okee dokie!^_^

*levels her AT field*NOW WE CRUSH SOME ROACHES!

*charges up to maximum power*^___^

Misato:*ducks out of the way of the hundreds of dead roaches laying on their backs*

Misato:AIIEEE!@^@

*crunch!crunch!crunch!crunchcrunchcrunchcrunch WHAM!*

*kills a few hundred more*^___^

Misato: ACK!0_o *dodges out of the way of an At field*

IZUUNNNNAAAAA!!!!!!!

Misato:*covers her ears*0_o

*a few more die*

*WHAM!*

AGH!>o<

*scuffle*

Roaches:EEP!0_o

*charges up a bit more*OK!THIS IS _WAR!_

Misato:*still covering ears*0_0

*suddenly creates an explosion the size of an N^2 bomb explosion,and of course,is well protected,along with everyone else...I'm not going to let you guys get hurt,right?^^;*

BOOOOOMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*silence*

eh he he he..^^;;;;;;;;;;;;

*notices the thousands of dead roaches lining up in huge piles*

*wipes her forehead*

Misato:*trembletremble*You got 'em?0_O

hai..seems so..

*chirp*

but there's probably tons more...

Misato:What a total complete brag..

HEY!I NEVER DO THIS!ESPECIALLY AN N^2 SIZE-EXPLOSION!

Misato:But thats one hell of an explosion!Besides that Ian-san's gonna be pissed that you used such a big .JPG!>o<

*sweatdrop*^^;;;;HEY!This is jmy last time I use such a big image!I swear!^^;

Misato:*gruntgrunt*

^_^;;;

*sidenote:yes,that picture was from EVA-R fanfiction (www.eva-r.com) and I think it portrayed the explosion perfectly..so Its _NOT_ mine and it belongs to Eva-R artists and authors...yadda yadda..yadda?^^;